Four reasons why someone might say no to your help.

1 Pride, sometimes accepting help can feel like admitting inferiority, inadequacy,dependency,or defeat. An example is accepting an offer of money,even a loan, can make someone feel like a charity case.

2 Unworthiness some people grow up thinking that asking for things without explicitly earning them is unacceptably selfish, they might feel that they have no right to your help. If these individuals did allow themselves to accept what you are freely giving they would end up feeling guilty or even anxious.

3 Indebtedness People who seem excessively independent may have learned to be that way because their experience validated the notion that accepting help from anybody is too risky. If your offer threatens their sense of freedom, security,or autonomy they fill compelled to reject it.

4 Vulnerability Individuals with serious trust issues may fear that accepting a favor will create an imbalance, weakening their status in the relationship. In their past such ” taking ” was unexpectedly used against them.

Photo Flickr
Source Psychology Today
Leon Seltzer



3 thoughts on “Rejected

  1. Such a great post! So many things to consider as to why it is hard to ask for help! One more reason it’s so important to be in touch with the way we think and how it ultimately affects the way we behave.

    • Do you think that many individuals operate on ” autopilot” they don’t take the time or are afraid to self-analyze their behavior? Many of our reactions to others becomes standard operating procedure that’s why as you stated thinking becomes imperative! Thank you for taking time to comment and appreciating my post.

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